I think we are at the stage in our relationship where we can be honest with each other. (Can you believe it’s seven months since we first met?) It's time for you to tell me what you think of me!
I started Sofa and the City because I wanted to see if I could write. I knew nothing about blogging – I didn’t really even know what a blog was. And I didn’t know much more about writing. I wrote a few pieces for the local M.E. Group's Newsletter when I realised, ooh I like this.
I then started fantasising about having a column in a magazine but realised that I probably needed some work experience first. I thought blogging would be a great apprenticeship. It is a very public way of seeing if I can actually write. I also needed to established whether or not I can I come up with something interesting to say on a regular basis. And most importantly, do people actually like what I have to say.
And so my blogging adventure began. It turns out that I love it. Writing is a wonderful escape. I enjoy the whole process of having an idea and then bringing it to life with words. It has also turned out to be rather wonderful therapy, which I had never expected. And of course, I have met some amazing people, who share alternative perspectives, offer words of support or simply make me smile.
So now that I have established that blogging is very much for me, I want to improve my writing and see where this takes me. And in my experience one of the best ways to learn is to get feedback. So I have decided to be brave and ask you what you think. I would be so appreciative if you had the time to share your thoughts. (And please be honest - I can take it.) I will do my best to take your ideas on board and give you back rocking blog posts – see, it’s a win win.
Here’s some ideas of areas you might like to comment on:
Content
Do you like the topics I write about?
What else would you like me to write about?
Is there too much about M.E.? (I fear this may be the case in the last few weeks whilst I've been in a - temporary - dip.)
Writing Style
How do you think I could improve my writing?
Do you find what I write engaging?
Do sub headings and bold text make it easier for you to read the posts?
Are the posts too long?
Look of the blog
Do you find it easy to navigate the blog?
How could I improve the look of the blog?
And, of course, anything else you may like to say would be most welcome.
Thank you so much for supporting me on this adventure. Who ever knew you could have so much fun from the sofa!
Hmmmm! So many questions lol. I think you communicate brilliantly. As with all writing, one needs to decide who is the target audience and then write for them. I think it's called the "envisaged reader"! So if most of your readers are M.E. sufferers then they will be interested in your ups and downs living with the illness. If you decide to include travelogues (as you do travel now and again lol) then there's another group who will be interested and so on .... but if you spread yourself too thin topic wise (at least, at first until you're established) then you might lose readers.
ReplyDeleteI like the layout, personally I don't like things too cluttered on a page, it confuses the foggy brain and you end up not knowing where to look. The post layout is also great and emphasising important things in bold is also a good idea.
That's my twopennyworth. I love what you write so keep on keeping on working at your craft x
I enjoy reading your blog. Hence you are on my list that I check daily even if I don't always comment on them. I like how some of your posts generate conversations that last for days (you touched a nerve in your readers). Also an indication that you write well and get your point across.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Carolyn in that you have to write to your audience. You need to decide if you are writing your blog for yourself and don't care how many readers you have or if you want to inform/talk to the ME/travel/fillintheblank audience. That will change your content and possibly your style. I write my blog for myself so it does wander around a bit but is mostly ME stuff. I also have a food blog that I write less frequently and a figure skating blog that is on hiatus until I get back on the ice. This is one method of targeting audience and not spreading one blog out all over the place and I know several writers that maintain multiple blogs.
Thank you so much ladies for taking the time to share your thoughts. There is lots for me to think about here.
ReplyDeleteI know this might sound daft but hadn't thought about having more than one blog! x
Multiple blogs are pretty common over here in the States. Not sure if it is common over there.
ReplyDeleteIt is kind of weird how I got into it. I took up figure skating again as an adult and I found myself writing the same email over and over again since my friends wanted updates all the time. I started the blog to cut down on my rewriting the same thing. I loved it and blogged regularly for two years. Then Mr ME showed up right in the middle of my very first competition season and stopped me from skating. Horrible little man!
When I first got sick I was reading books about CFS/ME and one I picked up (that I don't remember the name of) talked about how there aren't enough illness narratives. People don't write about being sick or chronically ill and that there wasn't much sharing going on. I think the author was writting prior to the blogging explosion and I hadn't found the web of chronic chicks' blogs yet so I got enamored with the idea of documenting my illness journey. I started my main blog thinking that I would have no readers. I didn't even let my friends and relatives know about the blog. I just wrote to get things out of my system. Then one day doing some random search I hit paydirt and found the web of chronic chicks and have taken up reading blogs as part of my daily routine. I now have readers of my own and a few followers. I've told a couple of my chronically ill friends about it but they aren't regular readers or they don't mention it anyway. Some of the stuff I post can be a bit raw so it might be embarrasing for them. For some weird reason I don't care if strangers read it.
Hi Karen,
ReplyDeleteI enjoy reading your blog & look forward to see what you have to say & have been up to.
Like you I knew nothing about blogs before and have only read both yours & Billy Gean. So I'm hardly an authority on such matters!
Personally I think you have the balance about right, they are easy to read, to the point, so the reader doesn't "switch off". (10/10).
Your subject matter usually directly relates to your experiences & activities, and to my mind the writer such stick to what they know about. Which is exactly what you do! (10/10).
I don't think you "overdo" the M.E. content at all, it is a big part of your, and others lives. At the same time I think you handle it in the correct way! You never over dramatise it, and introduce a touch of humor with it also. Non-M.E. sufferers can read it without getting swamped by medical terms etc. I'm sure at times you find things harder than you convey, but this is to your credit as who wants to read about horrid symptoms when you already have some of them yourself? (10/10).
I did just briefly read a.n. others M.E. blog once (no names, no pack drill). After two paragraphs I was looking for the Valium!
So you keep doing what your doing! I have racked my brains to think of something horrible to say, but can't think of anything at the minute! However, If I do manage to, you'll be the second to know & will need to SEE ME afterwards. ;-) x
Fabulous darling absolutely fabulous MWAH.
ReplyDeletei think your blogs are great & hit all of us in the right spot :) i love reading them! you write from the heart also so i dont think u can inprove on that! it is nice to read about others with M.E & akes u know u not so alone so keep writing anythng u want on any subject ... u are fantastic! x
ReplyDeleteHey Miss Baffled. Thank you for sharing some more. It must break your heart that you can't skate. Mr M.E. is so annoying.
ReplyDeleteI understand what you mean about it being easier to be honest with strangers. I have a mix of people who read my blog - some friends and family read but mostly it is people who I have met in the virtual world. Although now the blog is more established readers don't feel like strangers. My blog is very open but that is really what I am like as a person. The difference is I talk more about M.E. here than I do generally with people in real life.
It sounds like your blog is great therapy to you.
Oh Roger. You do make me laugh. You should write a guest post. I'm so glad to hear my blog doesn't have you reaching for the Valium! Thank you for the 10/10's. Can I have a gold star too? ;-) Yes, I love Billy Gean's blog too. She is very funny.
And Anonymous. Thank you...Mwah. Mwah! xx
Hi Yve. Ooh - our comments passed in cyberspace! Thank you for the lovely feedback. I feel all warm and fuzzy. Glad you enjoy reading Sofa and the City. And thank you for the blog lurrrving...xx
ReplyDeleteMust admit, I enjoy your 'non-M.E.' posts the most, especially your travel ones. More of those, please (if health allows, of course!) :)
ReplyDeleteCongrats on the success of your blog xx
Hi Karen :).
ReplyDeleteI agree with the others - I think you need to pick your audience, so you're not feeling you have to please everyone all the time.
Personally, I especially appreciated your XMRV article and the ones long those lines that help us, in an engaging way, to better understand M.E, and where research is headed - and how we can be involved/connected with that. I like your upbeat and friendly manner. I really enjoy the personal touches and hearing about your life and adjusting to M.E., however, I DO find some a bit, dare I say, condescending/shallow... Money and image aren't everything and at times I feel it promotes people's misunderstanding that M.E is a lifestyle choice. I know you talk of the things you have had to give up on, and the treatments you've tried etc, but the being "over-the-top-posh" and focus on looking fabulous bit just grates and can come across as being flippant. I think targeting your audience more would help with this. Debilitated by M.E, I spend a lot of my time trying NOT to appear the spoilt trophy wife to sceptical family members and society as a whole... soooo I guess I feel at times some of the blogs taint people's interpretation of the severity of M.E. I understand this is your perspective and your persona... maybe others don't feel as I do?? I would be interested to hear! Thank you for giving us the opportunity to give feeedback.
I admire you for writing blogs and it's great that you find it therapeutic. I look forward to hearing what others think :). Take care and all the best on your journey.
Content
ReplyDeleteI think the balance is good. But I don't have ME.
Writing Style
I think you write engagingly and accessibly. To improve writing I think it is important that you write about what you care about and what you care about communicating.
Beyond this, old books are rhetoric are good. They give specific guidance to develop particular aspects of writing so they can give you something measurable. This can be very helpful. There are moder books like Writing Down the Bones too.
The length is usually fine for me.
I like sub-heading and bold.
I think there is a somewhat different style of writing for blogs. The best way I have heard this described is that people 'mine blogs for information'. I think this will be the case as long as search engines are the main way that people find us.
Look of the blog
Navigation and look is fine. I think as long as people can find and access the information easily then that is what is important. I don't think the looks matter much to most people (with the possible exception of blog (and other) designers.)
I think you write well. I don't think you need to make any major changes. I hope these few thoughts are useful to you.
Thank you everyone for taking the time to provide this feedback. I am so grateful.
ReplyDeleteIsabella, I really appreciate your honesty. And I do understand how I could come across that way. I guess I am just trying to have some fun and be a bit tongue and cheek with the whole 'being fabulous' thing. I am an intelligent (I think!) woman but I do have a shallow side to me. My blog is like I am in real life - good or bad. I will certainly have a think about what you have said as I do want to be respectful to people with M.E. - especially those with severe M.E.
Evan. Thank you so much for your thoughts and for being so specific. This will help me a lot. And thank you for the ideas on how to improve my writing.
And Anonymous, your feedback sounds like the perfect excuse for more travels!
Thank you everyone for using your precious time to help me. x
I think you're great!
ReplyDeleteIn terms of style, layout etc. I don't think you need to make any changes - your writing is clear, simple but not simplistic (if that makes sense), well thought out and usually very interesting. The formatting is also fine and I don't think that changes would necessarily make a huge difference.
Topics wise, personally I like the ME posts AND the 'shallow' shoe posts. The ME posts, good or bad, remind me that I'm not the only one going through the bad times and inspire me in the good times. Equally, the fact that you're striving for a life outside of your ME by talking about diamonds and fabulous clothes lighten the rest of the blog a bit. There are lots of people writing about ME with their dressing gowns on (myself included), I'd far rather read about your fashion excesses!
Hi Lauren. I think you're great too!
ReplyDeleteThank you for your thoughts. I like writing a about mix of things as I guess that is how life is. One day M.E. is all I can think about but then another day it's something else - like shoes or diamonds!
I definitely don't want to be serious all the time. That would depress me never mind anyone else.
Now move away from your dressing gown and treat yourself to some fashion excess!
Thank you for your words of encouragement. xx
Hi Karen,
ReplyDeleteThis blog entry itself illustrates why I love your blog so much: you just put yourself out there for all of us to see. I've never seen another blogger (or writer for that matter) have the guts to just allow anyone in the world to offer a critique of something so personal as his or her writing.
So, I love your blog for your honesty. I also love it because you're such a good writer. You're writing has style and humor and is sometimes incredibly creative (I still love looking back at the way you wrote about the Lightning Process -- I think that was the name of it -- where you talked about the flirtation, the infatuation, the disappointment, etc.). It was so creative, funny, but also brutally honest that I read it aloud to my husband.
And, I think the mix is just right -- from serious subjects (M.E. obviously) to lighter stuff to the travelogues. The mix makes each of your posts a surprise. I never know what I'm going to read when I see you have a new post and I love that element of unpredictability about what I'm about to click on.
Love love love your blog.
Hi Toni
ReplyDeleteThank you for the wonderful words of encouragement. You have always supported me on this blogging adventure and it means so much to me. I sometimes forget that we have never actually met!
I think we can safely say that there will be more unpredictability along the way. My mind is a crazy place.
And my blog loves loves loves you! x
Hi Karen,
ReplyDeleteJust wanted to add that I too absolutely love your blog and look forward to reading it. Totally agree with Toni, I love the way you write with total honesty about your life. I love the humour and positivity in your blogs, and I can always identify with the ones that are more M.E focussed. With 2 young children and Mr, M.E competing for my time and energy, I also enjoy the travel blogs as it gives me hope that I will get back into the big wide world one day soon! I love your blogs and just wanted to say thank you and hope you keep on writing!
Aah..Thank you Alison. I know I've said it before but in total awe of you managing Mr M.E. and 2 little ones. I can only just manage myself!
ReplyDeleteI can promise you I will be carrying on with the writing as I just love it. And I hope I will be able to keep up the honesty, humour and positivity. I will certainly be trying!
Love and energy...xx
I am struggling to work out why you write about m.e because it seems to me that you have no idea what m.e/cfs is. I find your posts offensive with no compassion to those of us who are bedbound. All you seem to do in your posts is have your head in the clouds, perhaps you are bored & jumping on the m.e/cfs matter. I wonder if your fantasies about writing a magazine column have clouded your judgement & you were at a loss about what else to write about? Try having real m.e and you might become a better writer on the subject.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry you feel this way. I have no doubt that having severe M.E. is a very different experience to having moderate M.E. But I am not sure this means I don't have M.E.
ReplyDeleteI know how tough I have found it living with just moderate M.E. so I can only begin to imagine how hard it is to be bed bound.
If I was bored and could write about anything I am sure I would not pick M.E. out of the blue as a topic. I would much rather be writing about being well.
I write about my life and I try to have some fun and find humour in situations, even when those situations are challenging. Does this mean my head is in the clouds?
I know that severe M.E. is very different to what I have but I am not sure that means that I am not entitled to write about my own experiences.
I am truly sorry that I have offended you so much.
Karen I applaud your sensitive and measured response to Miss Anonymous (above) who clearly thinks that because she feels passionately about an issue it gives her the right to be rude and offensive.
ReplyDeleteI've followed this blog from the beginning and have noticed that your readership is a diverse mix of folk including 'well' people like myself to others whose lives are severely affected by illness. Many of the latter often comment on how inspiring they find your words and more over, use what precious energy they have to write to say thank you and share their experiences. Please keep this in mind when confronted by people whose approach to life is so very 'different' to yours.
W H Auden wrote “The interests of a writer and the interest of his readers are never the same and if, on occasion, they happen to coincide, this is a lucky accident”
Well I reckon for many of your readers you are their ‘lucky accident’
On behalf all of us that aren’t quite as magnanimous as you in the face of such rudeness might I suggest to those who find your optimism, warmth and genuine interest in others offensive, to do themselves and us a favour and do their reading elsewhere?